I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
