I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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