When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
