Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
you are never too drunk for berry picking
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
So apparently I’m into choking now
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
