she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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