She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
