Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
