Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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