So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
