bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
