i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize
