who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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