i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize