Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
