So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Randomize
