there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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