party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
ttyl tear gas
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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