Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
