Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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