Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
