I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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