Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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