How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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