I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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