he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I just forgot I was standing up.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
