did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize