what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize