is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
