SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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