I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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