So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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