once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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