haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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