I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
