I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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