waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
