i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
