My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
