last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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