I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
