you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
