absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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