Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
try to milk me bitch
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