I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
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