He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I have feelings that need drinking.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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