Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
