The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
