just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
