OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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