So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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