I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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