You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
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